Deflower and abandon.

So I had a couple of dreams last night, and I thought I’d document them since I haven’t done that in a while. But as I feel my heartbeat quickening, I have a feeling that I’ll regret writing about one of them because I’d rather forget that one.

It took a while before I could remember the first dream, probably because the second one made such a strong impression. So apparently, I lost my virginity last night. Or I guess I should say, my subconscious virginity. I’d been close to doing that once before. I think it was during the summer, it was pretty late in the morning but I was fast asleep (no school to keep you from sleeping in), and Michael Cera was just about to pop my cherry when…I got a text message. From this one. Yes, my dear old friend the Subconscious Cockblocker (I should just call you S.C. from now on). Yeah so anyways, this time it was Taylor Lautner who got cast as the cherry-popper. At least I think we went all the way. I dunno it was implied, like a PG-13 movie. It’s funny how some things are left out in dreams because my mind has no idea how to conjure that image, I don’t have any experience to draw inspiration from. All I can remember is that he was panting a lot and that I was on top. Now that I think of it, I don’t even think that we finished. Oh my God how sucky am I at having sex dreams?

Yeah so that was kind of funny. But then I woke up at 5 am and decided to force myself to sleep again…bad idea. Fucking horrible idea actually. I had a proper nightmare. I was in a huge mansion in the middle of nowhere, it was literally just beige sand as far as the eye could see, and I had a bunch of friends over for a pre-party. Everyone had changed into their “party clothes” except me and I was like: “Wait for me!” The bathroom was occupied, so I was like banging on the door and shouting that I need to change. And then the bathroom was empty and I went in to change. While I was changing, I noticed that the walls were of glass and outside was a girl with black glossy eyes and blood pouring out of her mouth. I was terrified and ran out to find that everyone had left. Then I realized that I didn’t have my contacts in and my glasses were in the bathroom. This time, there were two girls outside, staring blankly with the blood staining their white dresses. Once again, I was horrified and ran out. This time, I could hear that there were a bunch of people in the next room and my mother appeared. I asked where my friends were but she just answered: “They left.” and went back to the crowd. As soon as she left, everything turned dead silent and I felt this painful pressure in my ears. All the windows shattered and everything turned black.

I really hate my mind sometimes.